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Rumpelstiltskin
Writer: Bándi Gábor
Roles:
Narrator:
Father:
Daughter/Slaughter:
King Edward:
Greinfeistein:
Dzsémsz Bond:
Queen:
Galamb(racist):
God:
Angels:
Death:
Narrator: Edward king, British king,
On the pale horse lovagling;
But Wales is so far away,
So Edward have to stay.
Montgomery is the name of the town,
Where he first sat down,
He is the lord of the fort,
So he drank a very much bort.
And in this nice, peaceful town,
A proud father wanted to settle down;
This proud father had a daughter,
Who exactly was a slaughter.
The father worked in a factory,
Near to market Ecseri,
Where illegal immigrants
Always sell cheaplychinese pants.
But father was a proud illegal worker,
Whose girl’s only job’s to murder.
So this family was so beautiful and nice,
Just a bit poorer than God’s house’s mice.
They had to beg for money from the government,
Because they were planning a settlement,
In order to become official állampolgárok,
Because they were just poor Iraqian barbárok.
And this father said that his daughter,
Who exactly was a slaughter
Is very clever, nice, bla, bla,
So he the egekbe magasztalta.
Father: She can kill like a fish,
She can kill like a bird.
She can kill anything.
Yes, she can.
Narrator: No, she is a nőstény.
Father: She can destroy a cake.
She can destroy the pék.
She can destroy anything.
Yes, she can.
And she can turn money into gold!
Angels: What? What did you say?
Father: She can turn money into gold.
Angels: Hú.
Did you hear that?
We have to tell it to the king.
Turn money into gold!
There’ll be a nagy bolt!
Turn money into gold!
We must tell the king!
We must tell the king!
What a nagy bolt!
Bigger than as on the Ecseri piac volt!
Narrator: When the king heard that there was a girl,
Who is able to turn money into gold,
And she is not fat and not bold,
He sent for the father immediately,
Who actually worked in the factory.
The little white clump of meat,
Called galamb went to meet
With the proud poor old man,
Who actually sucked wine from a jerrycan.
Father: What a beautiful bird!
Come here, my daughter, quickly megöld!
Hm, on the market it worth at least…let me see…
The price of a pack of diannáscandy!
Galamb: Shut up, old man, whose hair is grey!
I am not a galamb, but an agent of CIA.
The glorious ruler of these lands sent me,
And I think you should give me some tea,
But back to the topic, you should go to the fort,
Where the glorious king vedeli a bort.
Father: Hey, I am drunken or gone mad?
Hey, my daughter, I will be sad,
If you don’t blow this bird into pieces,
Because forintban megvan tíz is
A bird like this nice white creature
With shitting on your head feature.
Galamb: Daughter, do not be so stupid,
Before killing me, think about it picit.
I am just a poor, little creature of God,
-Hey, stay further with that rod!-
So listen to me little curse-of-evil,
Good girl engem meg not öl!
ÁÁÁÁ! It surely will kill me,
Oh, this situation is so creepy,
Gooseskin is on my back,
To move now I don’t merek,
Because this little sausage
Going to make here a carnage!
I think it is better to go away now,
I don’t mind where to and how,
But away, far away from here,
I don’t want to die because of this queer!
Shit! It is coming!
It is time for going!
Oh…hey, look there! Airplane!
Hehe! I won the game!
King: I heard you have a daughter,
Who is a genious slaughter.
Father: Yeah, I do. A wonderful creature.
King: I heard many things about her.
She can kill very unusual things,
For example tanks and goblins.
Father: Yes, she can do a lot of things,
Not only big fish-killings,
But…er…
King: Bla, bla, bla! I’ve heard these things,
But I’m interested in financial things.
I heard she can turn money into gold,
And she is not fat or bold!
Father: Ummmm……ahhh…..
King: Well???
Father: Ummumummmummu.
King: Does she or doesn’t she?
Father: Ummm…yeahhhh….ahhh….
King: Is it really true?
Not just a big kamu?
Can she do such a thing?
From 1HUF she makes a ring?
Father: Yes, of course, it is true,
Not just a poor man’s kamu.
Of course, she can.
Narrator: Hey, she is not a can! She is a human!
King: Then bring her here,
You have nothing to fear,
If she is not bold,
And can turn money into gold.
But if not ….
Death: Then…
Narrator: And so the father went home, and drink a lot,
Told his daughter that the king is a rot,
And he wants her to meet with Edward,
Before of that rude bard.
Daughter: The king, the king?
He wants to meet me?
Without fee, for free?
Why? Why?
I’m so-so shy…
Father: He wants to hear your sing,
Or steal your ring,
Or something like that,
But I hope he don’t want to do something bad.
Daughter: What? Me? Sing?
Sing for the king?
How can I sing for the king?
OK, he can take my ring,
But only if he pays at least…let me see…
Maybe a 100 dollars fee.
Death: 100 dollars is big money,
You know it too, honey;
So you have to sing, sing,
Or just turn 1HUF into a golden ring.
Father: Just go, my dear,
Do not fear;
Go and sing for the king!
Narrator: And so the father took his daughter to the king,
Who of course didn’t want her to sing.
King: So this is the creature,
Which has the turn-into-gold feature!
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AJÁNLOM AZ OLDALT
